Through Thick and Thin

We often hear the quote, 'I saw that you were perfect, and so I loved you. Then I saw that you were not perfect, and I loved you even more.' This quote is one of my favourites now, though its significance doesn’t come into my consideration in my teenage years. I praise the writer for its deep meaning.

Life is not all sunshine; we must also face rain. In the darkness, even our shadows leave us. So, what can we expect from others? No one stays with us during our hardest times. This truth may sound harsh, yet it holds weight, whether in or out of a relationship.

Everyone promises to stand by their partner through all highs and lows, through thick and thin. However, expectation versus reality take place. Relationships require struggle, they involve fights, and even when we talk about growing together, there's not even a guarantee of survival of our relationship.  Forever may seem like a myth, lasting only for a few months or years. While this may sound funny, it's a truth we've all encountered.

Here, I want to uncover the truth behind these promises. I'll examine how the quote connects with the points made. Let's discover what this quote really means and how it applies to our lives.

Let's start by dividing our everyday problems into two types: personal and relationship issues. Personal problems are things like work stress, family troubles, and social pressures that affect us individually. Relationship problems, on the other hand, arise from the dynamics within our romantic partnerships.

No matter what's going on in our relationships, everyone deals with personal problems. And these personal struggles can definitely impact our relationships. When we're dealing with our own issues, it's hard to be fully present in our romantic relationships. Some people might say that personal problems also include relationship problems, but we'll keep things a bit separate here.

There's a saying that suggests men and women prioritize happiness and relationships differently. For men, being happy in their personal life leads to a better relationship. But for women, having a good relationship leads to personal happiness and success. It's not clear how true this is for everyone, but both aspects are super important for our mental health.

People who understand this balance between personal and relationship issues tend to have smoother, happier lives and better relationships.

When it comes to personal issues, it's like having a rollercoaster of emotions. Suppose, Whether I'm feeling lonely, sad, or even depressed, or on happy mood because something amazing happened, my partner is there for me through it all. I share almost everything with him – not every single detail, but most of it. I want him to know about my friends, what I like and dislike, and pretty much anything that's going on in my life.

When I'm down, I need him to support me, say something good. And when I'm flying high, I want him to celebrate with me, maybe even more than I do! And it works both ways – I want to be there for him in his highs and lows, too. If he is facing a problem, it feels like it's my problem too. his happiness is mine, and his struggles are mine too.

Being together in thick and thin means we're more than just a couple – we're a team. We face life's challenges together, supporting each other every step of the way. We may be seen as a couple by the world, but at the end of the day, we're two individuals building a strong bond and tackling whatever comes our way as a team.

It's heartbreaking when problems arise in what was once a beautiful bond. In the Nepalese scenario, it's common for these issues to become public, with sad quotes and messages being shared. But in the midst of all this, we forget that we were once a team. Misunderstandings, third-party involvement, or other reasons can lead to cracks in the foundation of our relationship. Suddenly, what was "us" becomes "I" and "him," and the promises of forever are shattered. It's a painful reality that many relationships face.

These problems often stem from unmet expectations. Maybe I expected my partner to support me in my personal issues, but he wasn't available when I needed him. Or perhaps he didn't fulfil my expectations, and I reacted by pushing him away. And so, the arguments begin.

But instead of letting these issues tear us apart, we need to take a step back and understand each other's perspectives. Why did he react the way he did? What hurt him? Maybe he's dealing with personal problems of his own. Communication is key – if we can't avoid misunderstandings due to lack of time, we should at least inform each other.

A relationship requires understanding and forgiveness. I once asked my partner what he expected from me, and he said, "Understanding." After a heated argument, we stopped talking for a few hours, but then he reached out to see what had happened. That's how we saved our relationship.

Forgiveness is essential. If your partner truly loves you, they may make mistakes unintentionally. If it's intentional, it's worth evaluating if they're right for you. But in most cases, forgiveness can heal wounds caused by communication gaps and misunderstandings. After all, we're only human.

And let's not forget that our partners won't always be available or understand everything. We need to recognize the timing of love and respect each other's boundaries and needs. That's how we build a strong, resilient relationship that can weather any storm.

 

In conclusion, we see that even in the most beautiful of relationships, problems can arise due to unrealistic expectations. While every relationship begins with promises of forever, both internal and external factors can disrupt this journey. It's important to remember that happiness in a relationship isn't just found at the beginning – it's something that needs to be maintained throughout.

If you've promised to stand by your partner through thick and thin, then honour that commitment. But always remember, it's your life, your partner's life, and your relationship. Ultimately, you have the power to either strengthen or weaken it. There's no need to involve third parties to resolve conflicts – no one knows your bond better than you do.

As someone in a relationship, I understand that loving a person means embracing their world as well. Nothing else matters apart from them. So, let's remember to cherish and protect our relationships, and to always try to be the best partners we can be.

Ending with a quote, "Love isn't just about finding the right person, it's about being the right person."

💖

From 'Me' to 'Us'

Is it obvious that once we enter into marriage or a committed relationship, our language shifts from 'me' to 'us'? Does it imply that an individual suddenly merges into a couple, losing their sense of self? What lies behind phrases like 'the transformation from me to we,' 'us,' or 'two becoming one'? Are they genuine reflections of personal growth, or merely catchy social media captions aimed at evoking emotions? In this piece, I'll delve into my perspective on not only this topic but as a whole on overall aspects of modern relationship, sharing my personal experiences too.

Just today, while scrolling through Instagram, I came across a post from a famous person who recently got married. The image portrayed a beautiful couple, radiating joy and love. However, it was the caption that caught my attention and prompted a moment of reflection. It wasn't particularly unique or deeply meaningful, yet it resonated with me in a profound way. A very wonderful transition of life, from 'me' to 'us', from 'she' to 'them'. I realized that not only today, but from this day forward, they will be together till the end, sharing everything and forever living together. How beautiful it is!

Whenever someone asks, "Are you single or do you have a partner?" we often take it for granted, as if it's okay to have one or not. Relationships seem quite common these days, from teens to older people, spanning age gaps, late marriages, and even with similar genders. Everything seems so smooth and easy, because everyone knows that sooner or later, everyone will have someone. But I wonder if anyone takes the time to think deeply about this matter, and how wonderfully it impacts our lives. If taken positively, there will be someone for us, no matter what, to support us in every odd, to live with us, to love us, and to make us feel special—someone only meant for us. No more expectations, but still existence matters.

In today's world, casual relationships are more common. And even if they're not intentionally casual, they seem to be. Reflecting deeply on this matter, those who stay in a relationship might not be mature enough to understand the sentiments behind it. If anyone actually cares about the deep meaning of togetherness, then I'm sure it will last long.

Speaking from my personal experiences, I've recently realized that crushing over someone is just a waste of time. It doesn't make sense to love and give importance to someone if you can't be together. Casual relationships are poison for your mental health. If you have no intent of being with each other, then stay single and save yourself from lifelong regret. Don’t hurt and don’t get hurt by others. If you're ultimately committed to a person, then everything is fair in love. If you get a chance to do so, do anything for them, but the other side should have the same feelings for you. If they cheat or are not serious, maintain a boundary. In every relationship, self-ethics and limits should be understood by both of you. These may be considered as relationship advice, but you can see from this that my perception is clear.

A mature relationship is beautiful, and it is at its best when both partners are serious and mature enough for it. Everyone needs to understand how much weight, a mature relationship holds.